Today went work, then after go soccer at dolphin. Had fun and also had fun with baby. But I suddenly felt dam terrible... Idk why. And on my way back, I feel even more terrible. Actually wanted to walk home alone, wanted to be alone. But baby and Darren also want to walk. Walk to Prime there to have dinner. So walked together...

Maybe this would tell how I feel. I've typed it into my phone while on the way home. While walking...

'I feel tat this 2 days. Not really this 2 days la, but its the accumulation. Baby has been treating me badly. Not really badly also la. But I feel hurt sometimes. Idk why. I feel tat shes taking advantage... Sometimes dun care abt my feelings... Am i being girly? Too sensitive? Its like im her, when shes with terrence. Maybe im just to dumb, love her till like tat... Maybe she goes through more. But I awful... Hias... Dun she wanna cherish me? She love me... But treating me like some toy... Idk... She told me must treat her like xiao mei mei, must zhao gu her, I noe calvin treat you like one before. But im not calvin... Im too sensitive... I guess...'

My heart is pain, idk how to describe, its tired... Just so tired...

Used com after dinner, wanted to blog after my dinner. Just couldn't find the mood. Darren text me and I replied in watever mood I was in. Baby called me, I didn't want to talk, hung up soon after. I text baby abt my feelings... and said I will go to slp. Dun bother calling me. When im on the bed, couldn't even keep my eyes shut, even though im dead tired. Texted Darren and he asked me whether I would like to go down Prime and talk. I felt like drinking so went down. I was feeling so down and tired. Bought some drink with 5% alcohol only. Then went to find a place to chill. Baby pop out suddenly, stuff a piece of tissue paper with inks on it, into my hands and left. I really dun wanna see her at tat time so left to chill. Talked to Darren... Talk and talk and I teared. Just feel like crying. Idk why... Im so tired inside... Dun wanna say anymore...


Tired... Just tired...